Tips for New Parents
It's OK and normal to be tired.
Nobody is a perfect parent.
Nobody is a perfect spouse/partner.
Accept (not resent) the fact that your life will change - a positive change that takes work.
Remember that your spousal relationship came first. You have to work on this so your family stays strong. Partners are very important during this time and you will have less time alone together as a couple - don't shut each other out - you need to work together as a team.
Postpartum depression is real for approximately 13% of new moms and moms with more than one child, for approximately 10.4% of fathers and 28% of adoptive parents. Help is available to you and your family. See the Post Partum Adjustment section of our website for more information.
What you can do:
- Make time for each other every day, at least l0-l5 min to talk and listen
- Compliment each other every day.
- Make time for romance. For example, set aside special time for you and your partner or leave love notes for each other.
- Hug each other as often as possible.
- Smile. A smile is contagious and a definite mood elevator.
- Spend time doing something for yourself each day. While dad/partner spends time with baby, go out for a walk, listen to music or read.
- Talk with a friend or family member as this can make you feel better. We all have negative feelings, such as anger and frustration - and that's OK. Talking with someone will also prevent these feelings from becoming actions.
- Express your feelings to your partner and others using "I" messages: "I" feel frustrated when... "I" feel resentful when... "I" feel angry when... "I" feel exhausted when...
- Remind yourself you can't be everything to everyone - make a list and set priorities.
- Keep in mind you will have bad days. You are not the only one.
- Talk to other new parents – they have been there too.